Show All » 2009/09 » Lessons from my Weaknesses - Part 3 of 3
Tuesday, September 01, 2009Lessons from my Weaknesses - Part 3 of 3
Since I started talking about the lessons I have learned from my weaknesses, you may have noticed that the common solution to all my weaknesses is Humility.
Humility is such a subtle virtue. Once you think you have it, you don't, or at least you wouldn't think that you do.
This is why I can never claim I have it, because I don't. Clever eh? (Eh, I'm sounding like a Canadian now because I got the "eh" - like my wife from Batangas, "ala eh!")
Anyways, have you heard the story of the boy who received the "Most Humble" badge?
The award was stripped away from him the next morning.
Do you want to know why?
The boy simply walked around town the next morning wearing the badge causing him to have it stripped away.
Something similar happened to me when I auditioned for my elementary school choir.
I had a nervous feeling before the audition, but I was optimistic that I would be able to join the choir.
Upon entering the room, I couldn't help but notice how the choir teacher reacted upon seeing me. Her eyes wide open and her jaw dropped as if she wanted to say something. She was probably in awe because of my presence and eager to see me join the group.
Her reaction combined with the thoughts running in my head turned my nervousness into full confidence. Wherever I walked in the room, my teacher looked in whichever direction I was. She was watching my every move.
Eventually I got curious and asked myself, why am I getting this attention? Was it because of my tetracycline stained teeth?
Maybe she heard about me before, but where?
After some thought, I knew this audition was already in the bag!
To make the long story short, as I stood before her and her smiling face (she was a little overwhelmed I guess), she told me that I had been accepted into the choir. Yes!
On my way out, as she handed me our schedule of practices, she told me, "by the way young boy, your fly is open."
So much for feeling special.
Oh, the things that God does to keep us humble. For sure He does it for our own good.
Anyways, let's get back to the subject.
A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine asked me this question, "Why do we need to choose our friends? As children of God, aren't we suppose to be friends with everyone? If we select friends, isn't that prejudice?"
The scripture says, "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you." (Luke 6:27)
If we are commanded to do good with our enemies, shouldn't we do more good with our friends?
I'm all for that, but how would you known if your friend is really a friend and not a foe?
In the dictionary, a friend is defined as a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard. A foe is a person who feels enmity, hatred, or malice toward another.
I love having new friends. That is the heart of my profession. I have a network of people and connections. Even though I surround myself with many people, I only choose a few to be my close friends. Others are treated at a professional level. These people are my clients.
What type of people do I consider to be close friends?
People who make me feel important, respected, and worthy receive the title of “close friend”. These people are the kind that I can trust. They are those who believe in me as much as I believe in them.
Why do I have to choose my friends? Paul the apostle says, "Bad company corrupts good character." (1 Corinthians 15:33)
There is also a saying that goes, "Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are."
King Solomon, the wisest man in the Old Testament bible became corrupted because he did not choose his friends and relationships well.
Although in my case, I still keep some of my old friends who in one way or another control me or make me feel unworthy and dumb. Some of my friends blame me, pass their responsibilities to me, and constantly whine about how miserable their life is. Then there are others who anticipate that only negative things will happen in their life and who never fail in giving negative objections. In all honesty, I still love them. However, they have to understand me if I were to limit my time with them. I cannot lower my guard. Peer pressure is very hard to combat especially with old friends.
The lesson I've learned while overcoming this weakness is to test every new friend I have and see if they are a "great person."
How do I do this? In a blog by Bo Sanchez (www.bosanchez.ph), he defines two types of great people in this world.
The first type of great person: After talking to him, you walk out impressed at how great that person is. You are dwarfed by his greatness.
The second type of great person: After talking to him, you walk out impressed at how great you are. You walk out a giant yourself - as big as or even bigger than that great person.
I stay with the second person.
Moving on to my last, but definitely not the least of all my weaknesses, is my failure to live a simple life.
Do you ever wonder why many people want to live a stylish life?
Here's what I found out.
Stylish living is:
What other people accept.
What other people tend to look at.
What other people praise.
What other people love.
Let me ask you folks, who doesn't want to live a stylish life?
Who doesn't want public acceptance?
Who doesn't want attention?
Who doesn't want to be praised?
Who doesn't want to be loved?
Before, I used to look up to people who lived stylish lives, a life with high standards ( but I'm not saying I have low standards). The more sophisticated they looked, the more I envied them.
Then I realized, the more stylish you look, the more complex your life becomes. The more complex you become, the more you have to maintain your high standards. Worst of all, you end up having a serious competition with others.
Your thinking simply becomes this: if others can have it, you should also have it, and yours should be better.
You can never be content with what you have if you tend to look what others have.
You begin to define yourself by what you have - you feel good when you have a lot and you feel bad when you don't.
Not everyone is always going to try to seek out more. Some people are satisfied at a certain level, but there will always be others who want to keep on going.
Limiting the things you have in life does not mean that you are not successful or that you are an underachiever. I have known a lot of people who are financially capable of acquiring all the things money can buy, but they just don't want those material things.
This is probably how King David felt when he wrote the Psalms, "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want." (Psalm 23:1)
Today, my wife and I try to live as simple we can. Don't get me wrong, we have a grand picture of what our future is going to be like. We have written a three page dream book, and we are continuously updating it. This book contains all the things we want to have along with all the things we want to do.
When I first read our dream book, I asked myself, are we too materialistic and demanding? Am I going back to my sophisticated life? Am I too ambitious?
The scripture says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." (Philippians 4:6)
Before the prophet Elijah was taken to heaven, he asked his assistant Elisha, "Tell me, what can I do for you before I am taken from you?" Elisha replied, "Let me inherit a double portion of your spirit." (2 Kings 2:9)
Take note, Elisha did not ask for half or one whole but a double portion of his master's spirit! It was a very bold and ambitious request, but it was granted to him.
God knows the intentions of our hearts. "Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7)
The way we see ourselves in the future is what we are going to be. Our dreams are our requests.
Did you know that dreams are one of the cheapest commodities? Why? They are free.
No one can question the magnitude and the numbers you place in your dream.
When God ask David to build a temple, the exact specifications were given by God. When God ask Noah to build an ark, the exact specifications were given by God. When you pray for something to God, wouldn't it also be easier for God to give you what you request for if you have the specifics?
Tell God about your dreams and vision, and then ask for directions.
If you have a person but they don't believe in your vision, then all you have is company.
If you have a person that shares your vision but you have no direction, then both of you just end up dreaming.
But if you have a God who can take you from where you are to the right place, then you have someone who can give you hope.
Remember, your dream is your request to God and not your demands. Pray with high hopes and a humble heart. State what you want in your dreams, but pray for what is right in Jesus' name.
And if your dreams are granted, stay as pure as you really are and live as simple as you can.
What I learned from this weakness is that building wealth should not be something that makes you change your values or manipulate you into living a sophisticated lifestyle.
The reason why many of my self-made millionaire friends became millionaires is because of the simple lifestyle they lead.
Simple means, we don't need to compete with anybody. We don't have to compare ourselves with anybody for whatever they have or whatever achievements they have accomplished.
Praise the achievements of other people. Work with people who are willing to help you achieve your goals. Ask for guidance from the people who are already successful in what you are planning to do, and learn by listening to them and following their examples. Be honest to other people and true to your words. Smile a lot. Laugh a lot. Share your blessings. Love more and give more.
God is great!
Posted By: Allen Espejo @ 2:24:01 AM
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